Adoption, for us, has always been a part of Plan A.
In the bucket seats of my future husband’s little red sports car, driving past the local Kmart Plaza with Dairy Queen cones in hand, we decided how we’d build our future family.
Have two.
Adopt two.
It’s what we reminded ourselves and others during our two year engagement and through our first few years of marriage. But when our firstborn came along after a season of undiagnosed and untreated depression, the plan got tougher to implement. Somewhere along the way, the idea of adoption began to seem a reprieve; the smoother route to grow our family. So, a few years after our second was born, we were ready.
It sounds so naive to say today but it’s true. That initial prenatal season of depression hit hard and fast and I had no idea how to face it. The second didn’t take us by surprise, but was still muddied by the same waters. So standing on this side, lending an outstretched hand to pull someone else up, felt natural and Biblical and simpler.
But following Jesus, even in the plan we felt called to, isn’t for the faint of heart. Adoption isn’t for the faint of heart. It takes courage and endurance and faith but also a good dose of reality. Because let’s be honest, the enemy wants nothing more than to foil the Creator’s plan for redemption. If he can get to Him through us, he’ll take any measure necessary. Including but not limited to: financial frustrations, a flooded basement, a health crisis, exposing hidden sin, marital tribulation, parenting woes and apparently now the complications from a pandemic. On and on the list goes. But if we’ve learned anything through this journey it is this: God works all things for good for those who love Him. Including what the enemy meant for harm.
So at this point, according to our agency records, we are just shy of two years into this waiting. But in our hearts, we’ve already journeyed this road toward adoption for thirteen years; invested in it for more than three.
And if I’m honest, we’re weary.
I’m weary.
To date, twenty three mothers (and some fathers) from our own state have viewed our profile book. All have chosen a different family. Each time we’ve recoiled from the sting, reestablished our footing and stepped back up to the plate. Even through the heartache and questioning and the boulders that have felt more like roadblocks than mere obstacles, we continue to move forward in faith believing God called us here, now, for such a time as this.
Because where the enemy meant for that season of depression to hold us back, God is continuously using to push us onward. Where the enemy meant to drive us apart, God is using to unite us. So here we stand, hand-in-hand, on the battleground of this fight for life. The life of a child. The life of a mother. And even on the weariest of days, we count it a painful privilege to have prayed these twenty-three women and twenty-four children through this season of their lives (not to mention the countless others who have walked through the doors of our adoption agency and ultimately chosen to parent.) Our work here isn’t finished. In fact, it’s just beginning. It’ll take a lifetime. But it’s worth every tear because life is valuable.
And every one matters.
Jamie Joy may be the best writer I have seen…What a powerful story. The Reads also chose a fabulous set of bows. Check them out below!
